Seven reasons why an elder must not be unmarried

I thought I would conclude my recent series on why an elder must not be unmarried with a summary of some of the various points.
 
1) The first reason that I believe that an elder must be married is the language of the Passage concerning their qualifications found in the apostle Paul’s letter to Timothy: 1Ti 3:1 This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. 1Ti 3:2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; 1Ti 3:3 Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; 1Ti 3:4 One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; 1Ti 3:5 (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?) 1Ti 3:6 Not a novice, lest being lifted up with pride he fall into the condemnation of the devil. 1Ti 3:7 Moreover he must have a good report of them which are without; lest he fall into reproach and the snare of the devil. [Emphasis added]
 
2) The second reason is the meaning of the word ‘one’ used in this passage and the parallel passages, including the qualifications for deacons. Our study on the issue showed that the word is used, in the rest of the Scripture, to mean either ‘one and one only’ or ‘at least one’. It is never used as people would have it mean here, to mean ‘no more than one’. In other words, the word ‘one’ is always and everywhere contradicted by ‘none’. Thus a husband of one wife is never, by the NT use of the word, the husband of no wives.
 
3) The third reason is the meaning of ‘knowing’. As we pointed out Paul asks ‘if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?”. While this lack of knowledge could, of course, include someone who has tried the feat and failed, it can apply no less to someone who hasn’t ever been tempted in that area. Even more importantly is that marriage and family life itself is where you learn those skills: while leading a wife and disciplining children.
 
4) The fourth reason we haven’t touched on yet in our posts, at least not directly. Marriage is said, in Eph 5 and elsewhere, to be a reflection of the relationship that Christ has with His church; now in our betrothal period and one day in its fullness with the marriage supper of the Lamb. The elder, with his one wife, is to be a reflection of that marriage.
 
In this he stands against so much of the modern anti-marriage teaching. Whether it is the Catholics, with their teaching that marriage is ‘vomit’, or the modern church, with their denigration of married life, easy divorce, rampant fornication. How much chaos and blasphemy has been caused by the Catholic Churches insistence on unqualified elders, resulting in accusations of and convictions for pedophile Sodomy.

Paul insists, “to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” Solomon says, “Pro 5:15 Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well. Pro 5:16 Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets. Pro 5:17 Let them be only thine own, and not strangers' with thee. Pro 5:18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Pro 5:19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.”
 
Even from a practical standpoint an unmarried elder is extremely problematical: being required to hear, discuss, and even help counsel men and women with marriage problems: including sexual problems.
 
5) The fifth reason parallels the fourth. Even as the Scriptures insist that the elder be a husband, they speak of his being a father. Scripture is full of metaphors of God that include the ‘father/son’ relationship. Consider Sa 7:14 I will be his father, and he shall be my son. If he commit iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men, and with the stripes of the children of men:. These metaphors put in context Paul’s almost sarcastic question of, “For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?”

It speaks of the elder being ‘apt to teach’, and we know that God has given that role to fathers, teaching their children, day in and day out. Thus in this daily activity his aptness will be proven; just as it is proven in the lives of his children.
 
And an elder must rule, another activity that takes place in his household. Consider God’s blessing in Jeremiah: Jer 35:18 And Jeremiah said unto the house of the Rechabites, Thus saith the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel; Because ye have obeyed the commandment of Jonadab your father, and kept all his precepts, and done according unto all that he hath commanded you: Jer 35:19 Therefore thus saith the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel; Jonadab the son of Rechab shall not want a man to stand before me for ever.

and consider Joshua’s speech to Israel:

Jos 24:15 And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.
 
Today’s society is radically anti-children, with children murdered in their thousands every day. God’s qualifications for elders are the opposite.
 
6) When the Scriptures speak clearly on an issue, it is foolish and sinful of us to try to judge Scripture against our own wisdom. It is written:
2Ti 3:16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: 2Ti 3:17 That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.
Scripture clearly says that an elder must be the husband of one wife. Not no wives. Thus an elder must be married.


7) For my final reason I would list the other Scripture that speaks to the qualifications of elders. It is written: Tit 1:5 For this cause left I thee in Crete, that thou shouldest set in order the things that are wanting, and ordain elders in every city, as I had appointed thee: Tit 1:6 If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly. Tit 1:7 For a bishop must be blameless, as the steward of God; not selfwilled, not soon angry, not given to wine, no striker, not given to filthy lucre; Tit 1:8 But a lover of hospitality, a lover of good men, sober, just, holy, temperate; Tit 1:9 Holding fast the faithful word as he hath been taught, that he may be able by sound doctrine both to exhort and to convince the gainsayers.[emphasis added]